It is very hard when your mental health takes a dive for the worst. This means that life gets hard, and things just do not work how we want them to work. In life we go through stages of being up and stages of being down. This cycle is not a fun one and it can be affected by many aspects of life such as simply how your day started off: did it start in a great way, or did your cat poop on the couch again? These small things can set our day up for a great day or a very negative day. Things such as relationships in your life can also affect the way we are going about life. If one is in a toxic relationship whether that be with a parent, a sibling, a friend, or a girlfriend/boyfriend; this can alter one's mood while with that person or for spans at a time. However, losing a person that you were in a relationship with also can cause one to go into that dive for the worst, even if that relationship was not good or healthy.
When one takes a dive for the worst with their mental health, it can mean not wanting to do anything, not eating, eating too much, not sleeping, sleeping too much, being grumpy, mad, sad, exhausted, and many other things can happen when one hits a low in their life. It can be very hard to communicate this with others, however. One that is struggling with mental health wants people to think that they are okay, at least I know I do. When I am at my absolute worst mental state, I am the happiest person you will meet. I do not want others to see that I am struggling, because then they will worry about me, and they will feel that they need to put their life aside to help me and that is not what I want. I do not want to worry anyone, so I put on a smile, and I laugh with others and pretend that everything is okay, however it is not. When I am at my worst headspaces and I spend all day, in a sense, tricking people I come home, and I crash. I am tired and I cry, and I even sometimes want to resort to old ways of unhealthy coping. This is when it is important to talk to someone that you trust or call a help line as we do not want to turn to unhealthy ways of coping. I know from previous times that everything is going to be okay when I get into these terrible headspaces. However, I want everyone that is reading this to know and understand you are not alone in these swings, you are not alone, and you will make it through this. Every time you hit a low there is nowhere else to go but up. We need to keep fighting for that up to be in our lives more than the lows. I also want everyone to know it is okay to ask for help. You do not need to hide and put a smile on your face when you are at your lowest you can ask people in your life for help, and they should be more than willing to give it to you. I know things get really tough, believe me, I know, that is why I write these blogs. I know that all my readers are strong individuals that can concur anything they set their minds to. I believe in each and every single one of you and I am proud of you for being you and finding the help that you need.
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Everyone wants to be perfect; perfect at their job, at their extracurriculars, at their home life, at their personal life, and at everything they do. Although we all want to be perfect, we have all heard the saying, nobody is perfect, therefore it is impossible to be perfect at everything we do. We just must be okay at doing okay. We cannot be perfect so we all just need to try our very best at life and see where that takes us.
The fear of not being perfect can have many effects on a person, such as not wanting to partake in an activity at all out of fear that they will not be perfect at it on their first go. I have been scared to try things in the past and am scared to try new things currently and coming up in the future, because what if I cannot handle it? What if I fail? What if I am just not good enough? These thoughts block me and others from being able to achieve the things we want in life, because we are scared, we will not be perfect at them, or maybe we are just scared we cannot do them at all. I am a university student, I also have a part-time job, and I love to volunteer. I usually balance three classes, twenty-hour work weeks, and anywhere from an hour and a half to two and a half hours of volunteering. I have a busy schedule and sometimes I question if I am doing good enough in all aspects of my life. I know I am not always perfect. Although I try my best, I could work on some aspects of my life such as my home life, personal life, and school life. I am amazing at my volunteering, and I am now doing well at work. However, sometimes, I do not want to keep trying with school as I feel like I am not doing perfect at it. I want to quit some days because I do not get the best grades on some assignments or tests. However, I keep telling myself that it is okay to not be perfect. No one is perfect so why should I have to be. This is a great thing to remind yourself when facing a task that you must do but might not be perfect at doing. Something else that comes with wanting to be perfect is that we always want to take on more so that we can show people how well we are doing, and maybe even prove to ourselves how perfect we truly are. For me this is with wanting to take on another twenty-hour a week job. This would mean that I would be working full time, doing school, volunteering, and managing my home and personal life. I want to be perfect enough to do this and I feel as though I can do this. However, when we are trying to be perfect by overloading ourselves with things to do. We need to stop and think, am I going to get burnt-out? Am I doing this to avoid thinking? Or am I doing this to prove something? If the answer is yes to any of these questions, we should stop what we are doing or not start it as this will cause more harm than good in the long run. Trying to prove to yourself that you can handle everything and that you are perfect is a dangerous game. We all want to see ourselves as doing perfect in life. I think that when we see that we are doing good we always want to add something to challenge ourselves. This is a good thing to do if we can handle it. However, if it is going to take a toll on our mental health maybe it is not the right thing to be doing. If you are someone that struggles with always wanting to achieve more and always wanting to be perfect, I would recommend just asking yourself the three questions of: Am I going to get burnt-out? Am I doing this to avoid thinking? Am I doing this to prove something? If the answer is yes, then ask yourself: Is it worth it, if it is going to affect me in a negative way? If you answer no to this, I recommend that you do not do it, however, I cannot stop you and everyone needs to learn from their mistakes and do what they think is best. Not being perfect is an okay thing though, humans are not perfect, and to me not being perfect at everything that we do is the most perfect thing that we can do, it shows that we are human and human’s make mistakes. I believe that all my readers are perfect in their own ways and are going to achieve great things. YOU GOT THIS keep on not being perfect! Help Lines
Some days we feel alone and like there is no option for us, we feel the need to give up, or possibly even just the need to talk to someone quickly about our problems and have it off of our chest. This is what help lines are for. To talk to a help line you simply just dial a number and talk to someone about whatever is bothering you. For people under the age of eighteen there is the Kids Help phone, that you can call of text at any time. There are also many texting options for adults as well. As well as many places you can phone and talk to someone. When I was younger, I reached out to Kids Help Phone quite often when things were getting too much for me. I often used their texting support line as it simply looked as though I was texting a friend and then nobody had to know what was actually going on. It is okay for people to know in your life what is going on with you, however, if that just seems too daunting to tell someone, maybe you should try reaching out to a text line such as Kids Help Phone. I would also reach out to different help lines that where [provided to me through my psychiatrist when I finally was receiving the help that I needed. Before that sometimes I would call into a help line such as Kids Help Phone and they would help me get through the hard times. It is challenging to tell people what is going on inside your head. Although this is challenging, it helps greatly to let things off of your chest and reach out to someone. I always found that it was easier to tell someone that I did not know what was going on in my life than trying to reach out to someone such as my father. If you are struggling with mental health, please get the help that you need. Try calling a help phone if you are having a hard time. I have listed below some options on who you can call as well as some texting options. Suicide Prevention Line
If I have missed a good helpline to contact please leave it in the comments in order to help others that may be looking for a helpline in a time of need! Depression
Depression is defined as being a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. However, I would like to redefine it as I feel that depression, at least for me is when you cannot move to get the remote, when you cannot get out of bed, when you cannot even sit up without feeling exhausted and as if you just want to cry and have it be all over with. Depression is feeling hopeless in every possible situation, as you simple are just not good enough to achieve what needs to be done, no matter how small the task. Depression is “a persistent feeling of sadness” however, if you struggle with depression, you will know that this feeling of sadness, is not just being sad. This feeling of sadness makes your heart physically hurt, and your stomach tighten, this feeling of sadness makes it so that your heart feels as though it has ripped apart into millions of pieces, your stomach wants to be sick; but you do not have the energy to actually be sick. The “loss of interest” is not that of you get from playing a video game to long but one that you just feel like giving up on everything you have ever tried for in life. Depression is daunting and scary and dark and horrible. I am stuck in bed, in my mind, in my feelings. I get trapped in a position for periods of time as I am terrified to move. You may ask “Why are you scared to move? What do you think is going to happen?” I know that nobody likes the answer to these questions, because it is simple, I don’t know! I do not know why I am scared to roll over, but in my mind for some reason, somehow, it is the end of the world if I move and it physically pains me to do so. Currently I am having feelings of depression and moving my hands from key to key as I am typing is hard for me, it is hurting me and it is hard not to simply just break down and cry. However, what better time to write about something than when you are currently experiencing it. With big life changing events, comes with lots of feelings. With the anxiety and the bipolar disorder comes depression. Believe me when I say I have felt anxiety, depression, happiness, excitement, fear, and many more emotions all in a big circle. I get dizzy trying to keep up with all my emotions as they run from one another in my head. The depression has been winning lately. The worst thing about me being depressed, is that I hide it really well. When I am depressed, I seem really happy I smile, and force myself to have energy. But it sometimes backfires, when I cannot force myself to be that go getting person, I get grumpy, angry and mean. That is where I am at lately. Starting fights with my loved ones, not really caring, it all just gets the best of me. Depression can affect you in many ways as you may have noticed by how many different ways I have talked about above. From not being able to move, to being overly mad for the simple fact that you are hurting so bad on the inside it is the only way your body can think of to let some of the emotions go. However, it is that you respawned to depression, it is okay. It is very hard to get yourself out of bed, or grab the remote. It is difficult to not get mad at other when you just feel down. However, I know you can do this. I do not have the answers on how to overcome these feelings, but my best advice is just get up. I know that sounds harsh and not what you want to hear, but you have to keep trying, you have to push through. It is hard to push forward however, it makes a difference for yourself and those around you. The thought of getting up is nauseating, I know! Although the thought is overpowering and horrifying, what I do is; I stop thinking, and I jump up as fast as I can and I start walking away from my bed. This is scary, I know, but once you get far enough away it doesn’t seem so bad anymore. It just feels like a blur. I do not have any other words to describe it, but if you try is or you do this, you will know what I mean. It just numbs you for a few seconds and it can allow you to start doing something to take your mind off of everything. I know that depression is difficult to deal with and it is scary and dark. However, I know that you are strong and you are doing great. I know that you are looking for solutions and help, and I know this because you have found my blog and are reading ways that you can help yourself. I also know that you can and will get through this and that you are very strong, as for anyone that deals with poor mental health is one of the strongest people out there. Not just anyone can cope day to day with this much going on in their heads. So, keep your head up because you got this! If you would like to, please share how you cope through depression. I do not have many techniques throughout this blog and am always willing to learn new ways, so today’s question is: how do you cope, in a healthy way, with feelings of depression? Please let me know in the comments or feel free to reach out to me privately via email. Self-Harm
Throughout my life I have had to overcome many battles and sadly, self-harm was within those battles. I have talked about self-harm in other blogs and have written about self harm in other blogs, however, I have decided to write about the topic through my eyes. Not many people know that I have struggled with self-harm in my life, in fact, only my parents and my boyfriend know the true story behind all of it. However, I believe that keeping things bottled up inside leads to many problems, and I want to finally share my story in order to get some closure for myself, as well as to help others understand that they are not alone in this battle and there are many ways to help yourself through this. There are also many ways you can help a loved one that is struggling with self-harm. I will talk about my story throughout this blog, as well as some advice as to how to help yourself or others being affected by self-harm. When I was younger, I would get into disagreements with my parents, and this was before we knew that I was bipolar and had severe anxiety disorder. When I was about in grade six, I discovered self-harm, and it seemed like a great thing at the time. I knew that no one could know that I was doing it though, as I knew that others would see it as a bad thing. After fighting with my parents, I would slink away to my room and I would take a pair of scissors, the kind meant for sewing that are really fine and sharp, and I would cut my ankle. I cut my ankle as I could simply say that I kicked something and that is why there is a cut there, as I knew that if I cut my wrists or arms people would know. I was very sneaky and subtle about it all. I continued using this negative coping strategy from grade six until grade ten, four years of self-harm. I struggled stopping the self-harm and still often think of resorting back to the negative coping strategy, as once you have found that easy out of emotional pain it is hard not to want to return to it. I know now however, that this is not the correct option and I do not allow myself to go down this path again. I truly believe that people who do the act of self-harm are looking for a way to solve their emotional pain that is quick and easy. When I would cut it took all of the emotional pain that I had no idea how to deal with and turned it into physical pain which I understand how to cope with. I believe when people do the act of self-harm, they simply just do not know how to cope with emotional pain, and turning it into physical pain is the easiest out. Once one has found a way to deal with their emotional pain in a health coping mechanism as talked about in my bog “The Weird Things-Health Coping” and any that a therapist or counselor have told you to use, or whatever you find that works the best for you, if it is a healthy coping strategy that works, use it. I wish that I would have had someone that could have told me how to deal with my emotional pain throughout the four years that I was self-harming. I would love to not have scars all over my ankles, however these are my physical battle scars and when I see them, I remember the dark place I was in and remember that I got out of that dark place and am doing so much better. About a year ago I got a tattoo on my ankle, it is a butterfly with a semi-colon as the body. If you are unsure what the semi-colon means, check out my blog “Semi-Colon” and it will explain the significance of it all. In short, the semi-colon represent that you wanted to give up but you kept fighting and have gotten so far with just pushing forward every day. If you are struggling with self-harm, I recommend that you talk to someone that you trust about what is happening. I want you to get the help that you need to as soon as possible because it is very challenging to go on struggling with something such as self-harm. I know that one of the hardest things to do is to ask for help, however, it is very important to get the help that you need. I got introduced to an app called ‘HarmLess’ (it has a purple heart as the icon) by my therapist. The app counts how many days you have been harm free and also has an urge button for when you have a sudden urge to self-harm. The urge button has many different things to it and allows you to calm down and do an activity to take your mind off of self-harm. The app also asks to to pledge that you will try your best every day and asks you to review your day and asks you some questions and allows you to journal each night. I understand that it is hard to get out of the habit of self-harm but one must understand that this is not the answer and must get the help that they need. If someone comes to you and tells you that they struggle with self-harm, be there, listen, try and understand. Although you may not understand, whatever you do, do not make them feel judged by yourself. By making someone feel judged about telling you about self-harm you are making it so they will never talk about it again and they will not get the help they need. I hope that you are able to get the help that you need if you are struggling with self-harm, and if you too are a survivor of self-harm, I am proud of you for getting out of that habit and finding the help that you needed. Finally, if you are helping someone stay clean from self-harm you are doing amazing and if you are getting asked to help someone, please do so, as it very realistically could save their life. No one is alone in their journey and I am always here to remind you that you are not alone. believe that all of my readers are strong individuals who can do anything that they set their mind to. I believe in you and have faith that you can do what is best for yourself! Safe Place
We all have that one or two places that we feel our safest at. We resort to them when we are having panic attacks, depression episodes, invasive thoughts, and simply when we are feeling down. Our safe place is just for us a place where we can just be ourselves and feel safe while being in a state of mind that does not feel so safe. For some it may be a room in our house, a spot in the park, or maybe even our car; a safe place can be anywhere where we feel our best and where all of our worries, in a sense, slip away for the time we are sitting there. With a safe place one can be happy in a world of ciaos. I have had a few safe places throughout my life and have had them change when different aspects of my life change. The world and my life have been a chaotic place. I have tried to find peace within the ciaos to give myself a break. My first place that I found, where I went when life felt like to much was at the park, I would sit at the park for hours just watching the geese, ducks, and other birds flying around and they just seemed so happy they allowed me to feel a bit of the happiness that they were feeling. I remember getting yelled at because no one believed me that I was just sitting at the park for two plus hours. I had to be doing something bad. However, I was just trying to calm myself down. At the time where I valued the park as my safe place, I did not have my license and I was not enjoying going to school nor sitting at home. I found all of my environments incredibly stressful and did not want to always have to cope with being in them. So I would sit at the park, I would breathe, and I could feel this huge weight be lifted off of my shoulders. It was unfortunate that I was not trusted and usually was yelled at for being gone so long, however, I felt happy at the park and was willing to deal with all of this once I had gotten to calm down with the birds giving me their positive energy and the fresh air blowing the weight off of my shoulders. My safe place at the park with the birds is why I think that I love geese and ducks as much as I do, as when no one understood what I was going through, they were always there to listen. I hold the bond I have made with animals very close to me as they have always given me a safe outlet. I have also shared that things were not always great once I returned from my safe place, because I want you to know that, that is normal. When you leave your safe place not everything is going to be perfect, you may feel backlash from being gone and unreachable for so long, or people might understand. I also want to point out that is someone is disappearing to a safe place do not get mad at them for it, as that safe place is probably all that is keeping them together in that moment. One of my favourite safe places now is my car, because I can take it as far away from the stressor as I want and am able to park and listen to music and calm down. I enjoy sitting in my car alone or with others and just watching traffic or maybe sitting on a hill watching the sunset. My car comes everywhere with me so it is a great safe place, because no matter how far away from home I am or how far away from another safe place I am, it is always there sitting and waiting for me to have a good cry in or have a good laugh in. My car will always be close to me. I recently got a new car and I, in a sense, do not have as good of a bound with it. It does not feel as much as my safe place as my old one did. I love sitting in my new car, I just simply do not have as much trust in its environment as I did my old car. However the radio sounds good and that makes me happy and the seats are pretty comfortable; so I am getting used to it being my new safe place as I spend more and more time in it. My other safe place is my room, however, this safe place has it’s flaws. People barge into my room and ruin my moments of being at peace. People are also loud within the house making it hard for me to concentrate on just relaxing in my environment. Also if the stressor is from within my house I do not feel safe sitting in my room. More and more weight is put on my shoulders feeling trapped here; therefore I will move to a different safe place that the weight can be taken off of my shoulders instead of increasing. Every safe place that you have is a special place for you to be able to unwind. You have to find the right environment for you to be in your safe place as no one can tell you where you are most relaxed. A safe place should lift the weight off of your shoulders and allow you to breathe, and should not be in an environment that causes you stress. I would love to hear from my readers where your safe place is, and how you discovered it. Let me know in the comments. I would love to hear from all of you! When You Do Not Want to Cope Anymore
Sometimes I want to give up; I just want to say screw it and lie in bed all day and not try anymore. Why do I always have to cope? Why do I have to try so hard to do simple tasks? Why is nothing easy for me? Why does nothing go right for me? Why is everything so hard in life? These are all questions I ask myself every day. These are questions that I wish someone had the answer for. However, these thoughts are obviously not very positive thoughts. I know it is not always easy to be positive, through my blogs I always have a positive outlook and I would like to remind you that it is not always possible to be positive all the time, sometimes it is really hard, even for me. Although this is the case that we all have our hard times, we always need to try and look at the positives every day, or else life gets really difficult and hurts us even more then when we are trying to see the positive outlooks that come upon us. I know that some of you thought that there are no positives to look at. However there is always something positive to see throughout the day. Think you are alive, you are here, and you have got through another day. Now I know sometimes that does not always seem like a positive. Some days you just wish you could disappear, some days you wish you were just gone as that would be easier. I know that it is challenging, I know the feeling of wanting to disappear, of wanting to die, of wanting to slip into a coma so that one day you will wake up and it will all be easier. However these are not positive thoughts and you need to try and flip those negative thoughts to something positive. Think about all you got, even if it doesn’t feel like a lot you have a purpose, you may have not found that purpose yet but one day you will. I have found my purpose of wanting to be a councillor. I found that I want to help others feel better so that no one has to feel the same way as I have or that I am feeling. You need to remember that one day you will be what you want to be. If you live at home and your family is the problem think of the positives; one day I will have my own house, one day I will have my own space and will be able to relax more. If you are thinking that you are ugly, think of the positives; at least my hair looks good, at least this shirt is nice. Always think of the positives, to drown out those negative thoughts of wanting to give up. Life is really hard I am not going to sugar coat that, but we can all get through it. Sometimes you just need to rely on someone else to help you get through everything. When I am having a day where I do not want to cope anymore and I want to give up and disappear, I rely on my support person, my boyfriend, to get me through those days. I get him to remind me of all of the positive things in my life such as my dog and rabbit. I also have him remind me how far I have come and how well I am doing with everything. He lets me vent and cry and I feel safe doing so with him. I am able to let out my feelings so that all of the negative feelings are out in the open and I am able to fill myself with positive ones and be happy. When you do not feel like coping anymore it is always challenging. As you know that you cannot just stop coping as then you will not get anywhere. You know that when you give up things only get worse. Although we know this, how are we always supposed to be happy? How are we always supposed to keep pushing forward? The only answer I have to that is that we just do. We do keep pushing forward because we have to. We have to be here for the people who love us and we have to be here for ourselves. You have come this far, why would you give up now? Why when you have coped through all of those bad days and bad times would you let yourself give up now? It is not worth it to give up. It is always worth it to keep pushing forward and staying positive. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Some days we cannot see the light, and that is okay. We do not always have to see the light to know that the light is there. Some days we will be really close to the light or maybe even in the light and those days will feel great. Although these days that we see the light or are in the light feel great, we will not always be in this place sometimes we will get sucked back into the darkness and we will have to fight for the light days. When we are in the dark sometimes we do not want to fight to see the light, sometimes we just want to give up, stay in bed, cry, or just run away from all of it. However, through these actions we will only get sucked deeper into the darkness, we need to keep on coping so that we get to spend as many days in the light as we can. That way we can be as happy as possible for the time that we are in. I know it is not always easy to cope through our dark days, however you must find an outlet for that depression, anger, or sadness such as; drawing, writing, reading, painting, running, walking, exercising, makeup, cleaning, going out, dancing, driving, dressing up, organizing, playing with pets, playing with your children, visiting your parents or grandparents, etc. Do something that will make you feel better and that will make it easier to cope as the day goes on. I know that you will be able to cope but we can remember this quote that was said by an unknown author “Don’t start your day with the broken pieces of yesterday. Every morning we wake up is the first day of the rest of our lives.” This quote allows us to remember that even though we have had a bad day we can always make the next day better, and the next day even better than that. We cannot dwell on our bad days we must push forward and make the next day that much more special. I know that all of my readers are strong individuals who are able to push through anything that life throws at them. I understand that we do not always want to or have the energy to cope with our problems, however, try and stay positive and make tomorrow a better day then today was and keep making your tomorrows better and better until you are sitting in the light at the end of the tunnel. Psychiatric Unit
Some of my readers have been to a psychiatric unit such as myself. I was in a psychiatric unit for about a month and a half when my anxiety and depression were really bad. I got a psychiatrist when I was in the psychiatric unit that diagnosed me with high anxiety disorder as well as bipolar disorder. I spent a little over a month watching people come and go, and when I got out, I felt ashamed to tell people where I had been, and realized that I had lost most of my “friends” do to not having a phone for a little over a month, and not keeping in touch. Throughout this blog I would like to let you know what it is like in a psychiatric unit as well as how it feels when you get out. When I had my worst panic attack I was taken to the hospital where I sat screaming and crying. The nurses and doctors kept telling my parents to take me home, which they refused to do, as they knew that something was definitely wrong with me. I am glad that my parents fought to keep me there as I do not know if I would be here today if they didn’t. I was not given any medication; however I was in such a state of panic that my brain shut off. I blacked out, and did not remember anything for about four days. I do not remember being in emergency, I just remember I was not able to walk and I had to get pushed in a wheel chair, and my parents bought me a colouring book and pencil crayons. I still have that book I coloured every picture in order in it as I was in the hospital. I also remember getting up to the ward and my parents having to leave. I screamed and cried and tried to follow them but I couldn’t. I remember them getting a room ready that they could lock me in so that I would stop running myself into the exit door, but I quickly fell asleep in my assigned room. Then my next memory is a couple days later, I was happy, I did not know where I was or what I was doing. I got breakfast, and ate then was told to go to school. I did not know where to go for this, and that was worrying to the nurses as I had gone the day before. They showed me where to go and the nurses where usually very good to me. It was boring I will not deny that, most of my time was sitting in various places with my pencil crayons and my colouring book. I did not know what was going on for the first couple days that I can remember, and then I got into a routine. I would wake up, eat breakfast, go to school, go to an activity room and I think we used to play ping pong, then we would eat lunch then do a group activity related to mental health; sometimes a therapy dog would come, those were the best days. Then we had room time then supper, then more group activities and then room time before bed and we could shower if we wished in this time. Breakfast was eaten in our rooms and we had a bit of time to get ready for the day, it was always a big breakfast and usually pretty good too. It had cereal, milk, juice, toast, and sometimes fruit or other things. We got papers and got to pick what we wanted for our meals the day before, there were options and you got to check off what you wanted. After breakfast was school, some people had booklets to do sent from their schools, however, I did not. So I sat there colouring; which is about all I did while I was there in my free time as you are not allowed cell phones on the ward. Then came the time between school and lunch, this time was spent in an activity room. They had exercise equipment and ping pong. We all used to joke and laugh in that room, we had lots of fun hitting the ping pong ball at each other, and sometimes actually playing. This was probably the best part of my day as the nurses allowed us to do basically whatever we wanted in that room, it was usually pretty fun. Then lunch came, we had to eat lunch as a group in the main room. This was also usually pretty fun as the nurses supervised us, but allowed us to make each other laugh and have fun. We got all kinds of food for lunch and it was usually pretty good. After lunch, a therapy dog would come some days and we all got to give it treats and play with the dogs. The days that the dogs did not come we would get straight into doing activities, such as; making posters, doing research on mental health on the tablets that they gave out, or having a conversation. They usually tried to teach us about mental health during this time. We then had some room time before supper came where we could do whatever we wished within our rooms. Then when supper came, we all went to the main room and ate together. After supper we would watch a movie regarding mental health, usually more of a documentary then a movie, then room time again. One thing that I hated at the time of being in the adolescent psychiatric unit was that we were not allowed to have our phones, or any form of technology. Which I eventually got used to and this became normal to me; I did not use my phone much for a few months after getting out of the psychiatric ward. Not having my phone allowed me to learn how to deal with my emotions by myself and not always relying on the approval of others. This was a huge lesson that I am glad I learned. More rules they had were things such as no strings in your pants, or hoodies and no sharp objects. These rules are for obvious reasons. However, as I have said I coloured a lot in the hospital, and a pencil sharpener is considered to be a sharp object. Therefore, when my pencil crayon would break I would have to walk to the office from wherever I was and get it sharpened by one of the nurses. This got annoying but it made sense as to not giving a sharp object to a patient. The string rule was also kind of annoying as if you wanted to wear sweat pants they would always be falling down, and to get the strings back into the hoodies or pants after you had gotten out of the ward, was definitely a struggle. I was definitely secretive of where I had disappeared to for that month and a half to others for the first few months that I was out. There is this bad rep on psychiatric ward from media and from people just simply not understanding mental health. This made it difficult to tell others as I thought that I was going to be judged for where I was. Most people did not understand my mental health and how severe it was, and I lost many people in my life because of that. However, now I am not afraid to tell people where I was and be honest about my past, as I feel no shame in the things that I have been through. I know that I am strong for getting through things, as you should know that you are strong for getting through your journey as well. If you have been in a psychiatric unit, I am happy that you got the help you needed and never, ever, be ashamed to share your story, as it is your story and you have the right to share it as you please. Just remember that is someone cannot understand your story, do not feel that you are at fault for this, because you are not. If you have any questions about the adolescent psychiatric ward that I was in, or any questions in general, always feel free to email them to me via [email protected] ask them on my Facebook page LetsTalk MentalHealth in the comments or feel free to ask them on this blog post. If you were in a psychiatric unit and would like to share your story with me feel free to email me via [email protected] or if you have a story about mental health that you would like me to hear feel free to reach out and tell me your story through this email as well. Thank you to all my readers for keeping up with my blogs I appreciate all of you so much. I know that a lot of you are probably going through a hard time, or someone in your life is going through a hard time. Just remember to keep strong, you are strong and you are important. You can do anything that you set your mind too so set it to something positive and you will achieve great things. I am so proud of you! I would also like to say that I am sorry for not posting as many blogs as I used to, I have been really busy with school and am trying to keep up with blogging as much as I can. Always feel free to reach out and talk to me if you just want to share your story or if you need help finding a phone number for some extra help. I try and check my messages as often as I can. The Weird Things – Healthy Coping
What are some healthy ways that we can cope with how we are feeling? This is a challenging question sometimes, as when we are anxious or angry or depressed, we do not always want to think of healthy ways to cope. Our brain naturally gives us suggestions, however, the suggestions that your brain gives you are not always the healthiest, and cannot always be effective in helping you feel better. Today I would like to share some of my weird coping strategies that may help you through that hard time as well. First, let’s talk about sensory coping. If you asked me three years ago about sensory coping I may have punched you. I despised this method of coping; however, once you are ready for sensory coping it can be very helpful. Sensory activities for coping involve the five senses; smell, sound, sight, taste, and touch. You can do this anywhere at any time, which I like about sensory coping. You can grab a stress ball and say in your head or to a support person, it smells rubbery, it sounds squeaky when I squish it, it looks bright pink, it feels smooth, and maybe don’t taste your stress ball, but if you want to go for it! You can do this without an object as well, just do it with your surroundings. However, if your surroundings are what are stressing you out, pick an object to focus on. I sometimes even do this with a person, such as my boyfriend, I go through all of the senses in my head just based on him. Sensory activities can be used in so many different cases, taste is not always the easiest unless your object is a food, however you can always just go off of what your moth tastes like. Just become aware of what your tasting. Sensory coping is great when you are ready for it as it is easily done wherever you are. Secondly, let’s talk about jumping jacks, lunges, and pushups. Now when I am saying these things I do not mean working out, this is different. I have talked about working out in a previous blog, and how exercise is great for mental health. Although we do these things while exercising, we can also do them in a coping way. Instead of doing a full workout, because sometimes that is not possible if you are at a doctor’s office or some other place, you cannot just leave to go workout. However, you can stand up and do a lunge, I know what you are thinking, “I will look crazy!” You will not look crazy, well to some people you might, however to people with anxiety you will just look like you are coping. Do not let anything deter you from coping, so what if someone thinks you look crazy? When you are doing that lunge or maybe five, however many it takes to calm down, I do jumping jacks while ranting to my parents as it takes that negative energy away. Make sure you are taking all of that energy into that squat or lunge or jumping jack, or whatever it may be. Take all of your energy, every ounce of energy you have put it into the lunge, squat, jumping jack, etc. It is very important to put all of that energy into it as you do the activity, the energy will be released and will not be weighing you down anymore. Just push the energy out as you do a couple moves and I guarantee you that you will feel better. Third, let’s talk about squishes, you are probably wondering what I am talking about. What are squishes? Well, it simply is to squish someone or something, basically give it a big tight hug. I like to do this with my service dog. I stop what I am doing and I tell her squishes, then I give her a huge, tight, hug. It makes me feel so much better as that negative energy comes flowing out of me and I feel the love from my dog. I give everyone squishes from my parents to my grandparents, my boyfriend, and my friends. Everyone in my life gets squishes and they know that when I am anxious I just need to squeeze, or squish someone. If you are in a public setting and you do not feel comfortable just giving a huge hug, although never be embarrassed to do what helps you. However if you just cannot get up and hug your support person, try grabbing their hand and squishing that instead. Be careful with this one though, you do not want to hurt the person who is trying to help you, but you could probably squish until they make a funny face, but then let go because you are most likely hurting them at this point. But you now can both laugh at the funny faces they were making and that may make you feel better as well. Lastly, let’s talk about breathing. Breathing patterns can be a huge help when coping with anxiety, depression, anger, or really anything. Stopping your day to take that deep breath can be the difference between a good and a bad day. You can always do a breathing pattern such as the 4-7-8 breathing pattern. Where you breathe in for four seconds, hold your breath for seven seconds and exhale for eight seconds. This breathing pattern will help slow you’re breathing down and can keep you calm in a situation that you may find stressful. You may also find it useful when trying to fall asleep, as it will relax you, while counting takes your mind off of all the things it is racing on. Taking three deep breaths always helps me from not having a panic attack. The three deep breaths allow me to take a moment for myself, and usually a support person takes these breathes with me. Support people are great for this because when you start spiraling out of control they can look at you and simply say “Breath” and then start to take a deep breath in, to which you can follow in their lead, breathing in, holding and releasing three or more times. Do this, as many times as you need in order to calm down. Also make your support person aware that this is something that they can do to help you. These four ways of coping are how I usually get through my days; sensory coping, physical activity, squishes, and breathing, are guaranteed to push me through each day. Although, it is easy to fall into bad coping and listening to all the crazy things are mind is telling us, it is best that we use these good coping tools. Maybe you have other positive coping methods that you like to use, what are they? Share them in the comments to help out other readers and maybe even teach me a new way o coping. All of my readers are amazing, strong people that can do anything that they set their minds to. I am glad I can be on this journey and help you along the way through my posts, or with you reaching out to me. I would love to hear your story, always feel free to reach out and share! I love hearing my reader’s stories. I believe in you, you’ve got this! Working Out to Relieve Stress
We have all been there where we feel worried about something and we just cannot sit still, we just cannot get our mind off of the things we need to do, so we just keep moving around. Although, when we are in our state of panic we may not want to hit the gym, this may be your best option. Going to the gym or to a workout class of some sort, or maybe to an activity such as dance can be an amazing thing for you not only physically, but mentally as well. Throughout this blog I will talk about how working out can better how you feel mentally, physically, and emotionally. Now I am not in great shape, I can barely make it up the stairs some days just out of pure laziness. So when I talk about fitness it is not because I am in great shape, it is because of how much it helps with my mental health. I tell you this because I do not want you to be discouraged thinking that you are not fit enough to go to the gym, because that is never the case. As long as you are tying that is all that matters. I have been going to work out classes almost every day for the past week or two, and when I cannot make it to a class I make sure that I go for a walk on the treadmill at the gym, or around the pound by my house. I do this to relieve stress more than anything. When you work out your body releases chemicals that are proven to make you feel good. When working out, for me, it feels as though you are pushing away all the negative energy that is in your body. I am a part of a yoga and fitness gym as well as a boxing gym. When I am at yoga I love doing the shavasana pose. For those of you who do not know shavasana is a pose where you lay on your back on your mat and you relax every muscle in your body. When in shavasana you can have your palms facing down to receive positive energy from the earth, or you can have your palms facing up to give and receive energy to and from the people around you. I will do shavasana when I am at home as well as before and after my workouts as it is a great way to ease the mind of any stress and accept the energy that is coming our way. When working out I crave the burn of my muscles as then I know I am pushing myself. Through that burn and exhaustion I believe that that negative energy is flowing out of me and into the earth. I know that the earth can take this energy and make it positive for me or someone else to use in the future. However, making that energy positive is too much for me to do in my body, so I need to work out to get rid of it. This is when I am doing more traditional workout moves such as lunges and pushups. When I am at boxing, nothing feels better. Just punching out all of that anger that lies with me, punching and kicking out all of my stress and worries, nothing feels better than this. Boxing is a hard work out, and you will feel the burn, I just feel that most of my nervous and angry energy comes out though my punching and kicking at this time. No matter what type of workout you do, you are going to feel that negative energy leaving your body, and having all of the positive energy from the world or those around you come flowing in. Working out saves my mind from racing and helps me live my life day to day. I have talked about self body image in my ‘Self Body Image’ blog. Although, working out should not be the only thing you do to improve your mindset about your body, it can help. I know that I am not happy with how much weight I have gained over the past two years. I know I need to remember not to push myself to hard to achieve my weight goals, as then I could cause damage to myself. However, if I workout in a safe manner, I will see that weight start to shed and I could be happier with my appearance. This could be the case for you as well. Always remember that you are good enough the way you are, this is important because as soon as we forget that, bad things can happen. We do not want to be working out every minute of the day, or stopping eating. However, we can work out an appropriate amount and eat healthier. Doing this will improve your physical, mental, and emotional health. We need to remember to love ourselves for who we are and what we look like. We also need to remember that working out will help ease our minds and take away los of the stress that we are caring around. Today, I have a challenge for you; Try doing shavasana for five to ten minutes. If you have a workout you like to do, try doing shavasana then working out and then doing shavasana again. I promise you that you will feel great after doing this. Let me know how and if this blog or maybe even if or how shavasana has helped you. I believe that all of my readers are strong individuals that can do anything that they set their minds to. I know that all of you have got this and will excel at anything you set your mind to. |
AuthorHello, my name is Emma and my goal for these posts is to help at least one person know they are not alone. Categories
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